Hindi Wedding

3rd March, 2008

Firstly I should apologise for the gap in my blogging – but we have been away to Moshi for a wedding and just have been too busy!! (as you will see – read on)

Let me start on Wednesday 27th Feb – our day started as usual with Joey visiting us, we thought to give us our Swahili lesson, however, he was in filming mode. Part of the deal with SAIDIA is that we get a DVD diary of our time here and Wednesday was the first filming. (bet you can’t wait!) Donald and I then went to our placements for a couple of hours each. Donald then came into town to meet up with me and we had a late lunch before heading back home (Milestone House) (Actually having just come back to Mwanza from Moshi, it really does feel like coming home)

We then packed and got ourselves together for our flight to Moshi and Saga and Ruth’s wedding. Saga is Joey’s best man, and a really lovely chap. He and Joey went to the International School together in Moshi. He runs an Indian restaurant in Moshi, called The Spice Garden. He is an Asian Tanzanian and is a Hindu. He met Ruth, who is a white Irish, Quaker girl not so long ago and six weeks ago they got engaged and planned their wedding for the 1st March. They wanted a small wedding – usually Asian weddings over here can have up to 500+ people coming to many parties.

Anyway we set off to the airport on Wednesday afternoon, hoping to catch the 7pm flight (Precision Air sort of defy their name and are not precise at all!) We then heard before we got to the airport that it was delayed and was expected to leave at 10 pm – so we headed to Tunsa Beach, which is a lovely restaurant on the shores of Lake Victoria. It started lightening, which was quite spectacular over the lake. We had a meal there and then got a lift to the airport in a pickup belonging to one of Jen’s/Joey’s friends who was going that way anyway. So Donald in the front in the cab and luggage, J&J and me, hanging on for dear life in the back. Meanwhile, the lightening was coming more often and seemed to be getting closer – to the airport!!

So, eventually, board plane and take off, luckily away from the area where the lightening seemed to be, but still a bit of a bumpy ride. Arrived in Moshi safe and sound and got a cab to take us to Honey Badger. Peter, Joey’s dad was up to meet us (Lucy was still in Dar es Salaam).

On the Thursday we did some wedding planning for J & J’s big days. Donald and Joey went off to Arusha (about 2 hours away) by bus to look at wine purchases, and Jen and I headed to the hotels where the wedding is, where we are staying, and where the party is on the Saturday. So we did well, we sorted a lot of stuff out, I definitely feel like I know what is happening now, and saw the hotels where we are staying etc. All looking good. Jen and I then ended up at the Lodge where the Saturday part is to be, sat by the pool having lunch with Kilimanjaro in all its glory looking down on us – lovely. Sure Donald will have something to say about his journey to Arusha in his blog, but think it was a long and bumpy ride.

Its now Friday and the wedding got going. Jen and Joey have moved from Honey Badger to Saga & Ruth’s, and so they organised a taxi to collect us to take us to the District Commissioners Office, which was where the formal/legal part of the wedding was taking place. We (as per usual) were the first there, by a full hour! So we waited, in the heat of the day, till everyone else arrived. Paperwork then had to be completed before we were all ushered into the Registrar’s office where the marriage took place. It’s a shame as the whole building was so dilapidated and scruffy, papers piled all over the place and looked so disorganised and chaotic – but that’s where the deed was done, and despite the surroundings, the service as such was very nice.

The whole wedding party then went to Saga’s restaurant for our first curry of the weekend, and it was lovely. We then headed back to Honey Badger and had a relatively early night – the young however, decided to party and I think they eventually got to bed at 3 – 4 ish!!

Saturday was the day for the exchanging of vows and the Hindu ceremony. Again, we were first there (it all took place at the restaurant which had now been decorated beautifully and which has a lovely garden). Jen and I had had an Indian outfits made for us in Mwanza, so we looked the part, which was useful, as Ruth had asked us to be her surrogate parents at the Hindu wedding ceremony. Her parents had been unable to come over, she did have her best mate and her boyfriend over to support her and he (Dean) was actually walking her down the aisle for the exchanging of vows bit.

The registrar came and they exchanged their vows (and it was a very moving service) and we then had another lovely curry. After a short break and time for the bride to change from her white sari into her red wedding one – we started on the Hindu service.

This involved Donald and I sitting with Saga’s parents and Saga, within a circle of plants/sari’s and flower petals, with the priest (sure that is not his title). All eyes were on us and we were very actively involved in the actions which were taking place. We were given red dots on our foreheads and had to put them on each other (with rice too). We had to wash the bride & grooms feet (toe’s only as a token) with yogurt and then water. Had to hand over some envelopes with money in to the bride and groom (token dowry I think). I had to circle the small fire at our feet with water and then oil four times every time someone was called up to bless the couple (so 16 times!!! And the fire was getting hotter and hotter, as was the sun!) All in all, it was an amazingly colourful and interesting experience – and like all religious ceremonies, very few people seemed to know what was actually going on.

Ruth and Saga had no idea that, when they asked us to sit in for her parents, we would be sooooooo involved and have sooooo much to do. But it was truly an honour and a wonderful experience.

The whole ceremony took just over 2 hours, and guess what, ended with a curry meal, and dancing. It was a lovely party and great fun. Sunday – we did nothing but sit and read at Honey Badger. Lucy was back from Dar by then, and we lunched together in their lovely grounds (guess what – it was a curry!!!) When sat in the gardens of Honey Badger you can see Kilimanjaro, usually only in the morning as the cloud rises during the day to cover it up. By midday the mountain was completely covered, but by black clouds, so rain was coming! But before the rain comes, it blows – real powerful winds sweep and swirl around, raising dust clouds and leaves. Very eerie and atmospheric. It did rain then, very heavily, and it became so fresh, but the dust the wind had blown up was everywhere –clothes, books, hair, bedroom, its quite a thing – the dust. White t shirts, shirts, underwear etc all end up coloured by this red dust – which of course turns to mud when the rains come, but quickly dries and scatters again. Its just everywhere!

J&J joined us later and they organised a BBQ for us – as it was Mothers Day. The wedding party came too and we had a lovely evening at the campsite, which is part of Honey Badger Lodge.

Very early start this morning, (Monday) 5.30am!! – and back to our Mwanza home by 9.30. Back to the sounds of Mwanza (sweeping, walking, chickens and dogs) and dust. We have all decided to relax today, no work, and so we will do some shopping for food etc later and I think everyone is hoping for an early night.

Its been a great few days, but we must get back to it. Swahili lessons, and I think I am going out with Joey to see some of the projects TACOPE have been involved with – so hopefully will have lots more to report to the Blog soon.

Lots of love to all
J